Catching Up

It’s March already! Spring is almost Sprung here in the Deep South. To me, Alabama is just beautiful! On a perfect Spring Day we have no need for shoes! The bright, soft, moist green grass feels soooo good under our feet. A baby blue sky is our television on warm days, as we lay in the grass and make pictures out of the puffy white clouds that float by. Mystic Dandelions grant our Summer wishes as we blow the fuzzy puffs into the air and watch them ride the soft cool breeze out of sight. Thick velvety aroma of Honeysuckle flows like molasses with every breath we take, perfuming our hair, clothes, and encircles the sunbeams as they dance on our skin, embracing us with the warmest of hugs….

Then I scream as Olivia steps on my hair to get to her sister Rachel Lian that has taken OLIVIA’S SECERT DIARY WITH THE VOICE RECOGNITION LOCK! Olivia yells, ”My whole life is in that diary –LIAN!” Lian giggling so hard that it’s difficult for her little knees not to buckle, yet she finds the strength to power on across the front yard and out to the field, Olivia pounces (secret linebacker) she is, and powers her diary, with the voice recognition lock, that contains her entire life in it out of her sister’s tight grip.

Both girls return to my tranquil spot, dripping with sweat, panting exhausting puffs of (I’m gonna kill my sister) breaths, and cheeks redder than anything you will find in the cosmetics’ department. I decided to remain quiet and still, hoping that the peace would return, if I did not flame the fires between these two ticked off Southern Belles. However, as I lay there I started hearing Olivia screaming, “My entire life is in that diary” over and over…

Soon I started to wonder myself, like Rachel Lian had, what is in that diary with the voice recognition lock? I can’t just sneak it one night and take a fast read. That would be wrong…No, I’m her Mama, what if there is something I NEED TO KNOW in that hot pink and orange book of Olivia’s life?

What can a seven and a half year old have to say about her life? SHE MAY HAVE SECRET FEELINGS ABOUT HER NEW SISTER! I WILL STEAL THE DIARY TONIGHT AND READ IT….IT’S FOR THE GOOD OF THE FAMILY!

I had forgotten the entire event until after dinner and the sun started to go down for the night. Just two fast baths, several short DVDS, prayers, numerous “DON’T MAKE ME COME UP THOSE STAIRS GIRLS!”

Three hours and thirty two minutes later the coast was clear…both girls were asleep. My heart was pounding as if I were robbing a bank or working for the FBI. I tiptoed in Olivia’s bedroom, kicked over, Paris, the cat’s litter box, grabbed OLIVIA’S BOOK OF LIFE and ran downstairs to the quest bathroom to have a good read.

IT IS FOR THE GOOD OF OUR FAMILY…with that thought I commanded the voice recognition diary to, “OPEN DIARY” nothing happened, still locked. I changed my voice to sound just like Olivia, nothing happened…again and again I tried to sound just like Olivia and got really good at it; however the DIARY KNEW, I was not Olivia!

I tried to pick the lock with every sharp, pointy item in the bathroom and no luck, the lock would not turn or click in the least! Just my luck, I jumped out of my skin when I looked up and saw Rachel Lian standing at the door watching me. “WHAT ARE YOU DOING OUT OF BED?”

She smiled with her button nose all wrinkled and said,”Bolivia ook no open, broke” It seemed that Olivia’s OOK had been broken for some time and I was caught red handed. Rachel lian asked me to, “bove peese” (move please) so that she could use the bathroom! Then she looked back at me with a chuckle and took the diary saying, “NO, NO BOLIVIA’S OOK, NO MAMA’S OOK.” She was correct it is Oliva’s book and not mine.

The next day started with the same frenzy of a tornado on steroids, find socks that match, shirts that don’t scratch, bows that go, sign all the school papers, put lunch money in backpacks…GO BACK IN THE HOUSE AND GET THE GIRLS SNACKS! On the drive to school I glanced in the rearview mirror to check for glasses, we forget them a lot, when I caught a ping of guilt, as Rachel Lian smiled at me with her button nose wrinkled up as to say, I KNOW WHAT YOU DID…BOLIVIA’S OOK , NO OPEN…

Lian had not told Olivia, however, this was not a good thing, we have discovered that Rachel Lian loves to hold on to moments that humor her and tease you about it for LONG PERIODS of time in many creative ways. I would tell Olivia about my violation of her privacy after dinner tonight in between the bath time and DVDs, that way she will be so into Scooby Doo, that my crime won’t catch too much attention.

That night after dinner I called for Olivia to take her bath and she sent down the stairs a loud aggravated ”IN A MINUTE!” I knew by her sound something was wrong, so up the stairs I go to find her and her big brother Joshua with Dad’s tools working on THE BOOK.

Olivia said, “thanks MAMA, Lian told me you tried to fix my diary last night, It’s alright, Joshua knows how to use Dad’s tools, just don’t tell Dad, OK?” Rachel Lian replied, “Bolivia ook no work, broke. Hoshey fix, MaMa no fix…tee heee heee” (Olivia book no work, broke, Joshey fix, MaMa no fix…..giggle giggle) She added with a twinkle in her eye, Mama MAD last night…TEEE HEEEEE!

To add to the insult Rachel Lian went on and on showing how I had tried to sound like Olivia over and over, Open Diary! Then it happened! Joshua opened it and OLIVIA’S LIFE PASSED BEFORE MY EYES! As Olivia turned the pages I could not help but to cry…Page after page of pictures she had drawn of our family members and our home with Paris, the cat. Pictures that showed her holding Rachel Lian’s hand, Kissing her Granny Good Bye, Playing on the swing set with the neighbor friends, cooking squash in the kitchen in her apron, and running in the backyard with Brinks and Bear our Bull Mastiff and Black Lab. It was the way Olivia had captured the expressions and inner person of each one of us. A family that the seven members all came from different beginnings, places, put together by God, and now made into one family where we all belong. She, in her creative way put our families love on paper with one sentence in the entire book…. I love, love, love, love my family, my home, and Paris, my cat.

Rachel replied with, “ I nove you Bolivia, cat NO! I NOVE HOME AND COBB TOO” (She loves Olivia, No love for the cat, however Rachel Lian Loves her School Teacher Ms. Cobb!) This leads us up to my next post concerning how Rachel Lian has adjusted to her School Setting and where do we go from here…

Thanks for going on this journey with our family. If ANYONE out there is thinking about adopting a special needs child from China let me encourage you to first pray about it. AND GET GOING WITH IT! Our family cannot describe the LOVE, LAUGHTER, and TOGETHERNESS our special needs daughter Rachel Lian has brought to our family.

She was found under a bridge on a stormy day in the middle of China only two hours old. We adopted her 5 years later in April…..April Showers Bring May Flowers! It was raining on the day our airplane touched ground in China to pick her up!

We are thinking about going back one more time! Olivia and Rachel Lian are both on board with the idea as long as she is a younger sister. Neither one want to move DOWN the chain of command! Our sons Blake and CJ had the NERVE TO GROW UP AND MOVE OUT! Joshua is off to college next year. We will have a house with three Drama Queens, four if you count Mama.

I think it will be good for my husband to have FOUR GIRLS in the house. I LIVED EIGHT YEARS WITH FOUR GUYS before Olivia was born. If you are reading this and you were in our group last April, ask yourself, do I want to go back and adopt another child?

If the answer is yes, LET ME KNOW, I can use it as leverage to encourage my husband, Coy, to GET THE PAPERS MOVING- You know you want to go! -Joy 

Christmas, Reindeer Dust, and Snowballs! In the words of Rachel Lian, "Oh God My"

No not a typing error, Lian is working hard to get her OMG in working order!

It has been way too long since our blog has been updated, however, as always I have very good reasons for my procrastination. Cold and Flu Season has taken up residence at our home and our son, Joshua, has had his second knee surgery...Go Saint Clair County Saints! Can't wait to see what he breaks next football season.

Our son has no sense of pain or when to STOP PLAYING! Rachel Lian loved Football Season, after all her first English words in China were “ROLL TIDE!” Her Daddy felt it important to give Rachel Lian a good understanding of what's important in life :) Both our sons, Joshua and C.J., played football this year. C.J. was the kicker/ punter and Joshua was holder and back up quarter back. Rachel Lian loved watching her brothers play football.

She was the STAR of the game on the side line, literally passed around the crowd from teacher to teacher all getting hugs and kisses. Coy and I have been totally amazed at how this tiny girl from China has exposed the hearts of so many people in our town. At one of the ball games she received a phone call from her School's Principal to say hello and that she loves her!

Rachel Lian is crazy about her Kindergarten Teacher, Ms. Cobb. She came home from school and announced that she had changed her named to Cobb instead of Graham! In China it was Rachel Lian's job at the orphanage to gather the other children's shoes, clean them, and return them to the children daily. She developed a taste for nice shoes. Ms. Cobb has very good taste in fashion, and wears beautiful shoes. Each morning she greets Rachel Lian and asks for approval of her choice of shoes for the day. Her reply is always, "Oh Pretty shoes Cobb!"

The love and acceptance Lian and our entire family has received from this small southern town is amazing. Coy and I love to attend the local auction house every Saturday night at Johnson's Trading Post and Auction House. We always walk away with great deals on all kinds of treasures, but one night we walked away with a treasure money can't buy.

Rachel Lian had been home with us several weeks when we brought her and sister Olivia to the auction with us. I noticed that many couples had bid on toy bears and baby dolls, all so cute. We were shocked when the Auction Staff handed us the toys and smiled! They had bought the toys for our girls! Rachel Lian yelled Bye to all as we left for the night.

People are amazed at how well she has bonded with us. Even our Doctor commented on how she just fell into place in our family. It's funny to watch how each family member has his/her own special relationship with Rachel Lian. I sat and watched her pick on her brother Josh, poking fun at him and laughing when he tickled her. Out of the blue she told him, "you are pretty" Joshua is her snack getter, drink maker, sock finder. The two are a funny pair to watch each one out doing the other! I love to see their eyes light up with laughter.

C.J. is a Senior in High School this year, he came home from school bragging how all the other students at his school now say, "Wa ai nee", I love you, in honor of Rachel Lian. She is working on her language skills and improving daily.

About a month ago she asked me to "cookie da cat" I was amused at first because "cookie" means, to cook, in Rachel Lian's mind. She insisted that we cook Paris, our fat fluffy puff of fur! "Cat BIG, COOKIE NOW" she insisted... Later that week while shopping in a dollar store she stopped dead in her tracks at the baking pans and frantically grabbed a loaf pan beaming loudly across the store, "MAMA PAN COOKIE CAT NOW!" A young couple caught what she was saying and laughed their way out of the store. I explained to her that Paris is our pet and we do not eat our pets. Every once in a while I catch her staring at our tempting fat ball of fur, she smiles with a twinkle in her eyes back at me.

How can I put into words the Love and Laughter, this tiny girl with the biggest smile you have ever seen, has brought into our lives and the lives around us! Strangers are instantly smitten with her pure honest love for people and life. Happiness oozes out of her pores and is contagious! She now tells us, "I dove you". She may not pronounce every word correctly, but they sound like music to us.

We are learning more about her every day now that she can tell us. The description we received from China concerning her personality was perfect in every way. As a mother I am so thankful for the caregivers love and affection Rachel Lian received in China. Because of this, she is able to give love and affection in return. Her always ready to help others and great attitude is a testament to the examples her teachers provided.

A year ago Christmas, after all the gifts had been opened, the food had been put away, I sat down to rest and realized that I was staring at a small unopened box under the tree. Inside the box was the doll that I handed to Rachel Lian the following April as we met for the first time. This Christmas left little time for any rest with Coy and I working to help Santa check off his list.

Rachel Lian and Olivia met Santa at the local arts and crafts fair. Rachel Lian shook all over with excitement screaming, “Santa pies, good girl!" This means Santa bring prizes, I've been a good girl! She hugged him with all her might and jumped on his knee for a picture. Olivia slowly walked over to Santa and replied in a low whisper," I'm just here for the picture" Meaning in Olivia language, I'm not sure if I am on the good or naughty list so let's skip the unpleasantries, please.

Next item on our list was to go out at night and find Reindeer Dust (looks like colored sugar) to put on our Christmas cookies. Coy always finds Ziploc baggies full of the stuff! Christmas came with a loud, "OH GOD MY!" Rachel Lian stood there staring at the gifts around the tree not sure what to do. Coy handed out the gifts as she opened each one carefully and then carried them one by one upstairs to her bedroom yelling, "Olivia NO, MY PIES!"

Santa brought Rachel Lian the piano (key board with mic) she had asked for! Now we are awaken every morning to the tune from the Titanic Movie playing and Rachel Lian on the mic singing “I dove you" and other words I haven’t decoded yet. Rachel Lian looked outside and yelled," NO! LOOK NO!" It was a rare sight to see SNOW on Christmas Day in the Deep South!

To make our Christmas perfect we got to spend time with our oldest son, Blake, wife Jessica, and Jenna, the smartest toddler ever! They have a surprise on the way too! Can't wait to hold him or her!

If you are considering adopting a child, may I encourage you to pray and look into the waiting child program. Rachel Lian was in this program and she is a sweet, loving, smart child, full of wonder and fun. The program was easy to follow from start to end. Coy and I would adopt again if we had the funds to do so! I promise not to take so long to post again. Till then, Happy New Year and God Bless You!

P.S. I have to give our daughter, Olivia, most of the credit for Rachel Lian's easy transition into our family. Right from the start at the Hotel in China, Olivia opened up her heart and let her new sister in. She has successfully taught Rachel Lian the ways of an American Child, pizza, happy meals, how to navigate the toy department, and the dangerous task of jumping the cracks in a sidewalk on a scooter.

Olivia was shocked that her new sister didn’t know how to play when she came into our lives. My heart jumped for joy watching Rachel Lian pull her wagon across the yard, she ran inside to return with a doll for her wagon! GOOD JOB OLIVIA, your sister has now learned to play alone!

We could not have done it without you and your wonderful kind heart and CREATIVE MIND! Just try to limit how much time ya'll spend hanging upside down on the monkey bars, no more bubbles in the jetted tub and Paris, the cat, looks better without lipstick!

:) - Joy Graham